“Serenity”
A response to Lynne's Question: "Audible Answer"
Have you ever asked God (your Higher Power or Sacred Self) for help with a
problem and found the response to be an empty silence? That has happened to me
many times in the past, causing disappointment and deep distress.
Where was God when I needed him/her? I was hoping for some comforting words that
would soothe my anxiety, some wise advice that would point me in the right
direction. Mostly I was hoping for some indication that there was a God who
cared.
Instead of a reassuring voice I got silence. Instead of a divine presence I got
a disturbing absence. I'd humbled myself and called God on the phone and it just
kept ringing and ringing in the vastness emptiness of space.
Of course this would just make me more anxious. The empty silence became more
troubling than my original problem. I had hoped for an answer, hoped to hear
God's voice. There was a part of me, conditioned by Biblical stories and
Hollywood movies, that expected to hear God's thunderous voice booming down from
the heavens (and sounding a lot like Charlton Heston).
I wanted to believe in God, wanted to believe that when I knocked, the door
would be opened. But when I knocked the door remained closed. At those dark
times, I felt either that God did not exist or that if he did exist he must have
decided I wasn't worth bothering with.
Gradually I was able to admit to myself that I was only calling God, seriously
calling God, in times of trouble. I needed to develop an on-going relationship
with God through both good times and bad and not just use God as a divine 911.
As I understood more about my mind and how the Toxic, and Sacred Voices operated
in my life, I realized that my Toxic Voice was the loudest. It was a big-mouth
know-it-all, always ready to weigh in with its opinions (and most of the time it
didn't even wait to be asked!). Come to think of it, it's my Toxic Voice that
often sounds a lot like Charlton Heston!
My Natural Voice speaks clearly and firmly with a quiet confidence. But in order
to hear it, I first have to make a decision to stop listening to the Toxic
Voice. Then my Natural Voice can give me a realistic picture of what's going on
and analyze my options.
The Sacred Voice is a "still small voice" that needs even quieter
surroundings and deeper attention in order to be heard. As I spent more time
cultivating my relationship with God, communing with the Sacred, I began to
understand that the Sacred Voice often "speaks" without words -- through
silence, a golden silence filled with Love. This is the sacred silence of a
great cathedral or a starry desert night, rich in mystery and meaning.
Previously this same silence had seemed terrifyingly empty because my Toxic
Voice (which religions have traditionally personified as the Devil) wanted me to
believe that silence was evidence of God's absence. "See, nothing but silence,"
it would say to me, "There's obviously no God here who wants to talk to you, so
you might as well listen to me. At least I'm willing to talk with you!"
Now I'm often able to sit serenely with the silence and sense a Sacred Presence.
Through a wordless telepathy this Presence invites me, "Just sit with me. Be
here with me. Breathe. Enjoy this precious moment with me."
Afterward my body feels revitalized and my soul refreshed. Sometimes I simply
return to my activities without knowing the answer to my question, trusting that
I will know at the right time. At other times I emerge with a new perspective on
my life, one that allows me to see just far enough ahead to take my next step
with confidence even though I don't yet know where I am going.
I remember once more that life is not about "getting there" -- it's about
enjoying the journey.. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to
you now, because you would not be able to live them, and the point is to live
everything. Take some time today (perhaps right now for just one minute?) and
sit with the Silence. Allow yourself to become aware of the Sacred Presence that
comforts and guides without words.
You will discover your life’s purpose and experience unshakable serenity amidst
life’s ever changing circumstances. Feel the feelings and keep breathing.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said
“The wise man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger but for deliverance from fear. It is the storm within which endangers him, not the storm without.” Serenity as it is for me: Lynne N. May 19, 2008
“The wise man in the storm prays to God, not for safety from danger but for deliverance from fear. It is the storm within which endangers him, not the storm without.” Serenity as it is for me: Lynne N. May 19, 2008
